After Yan Hui died, his father Yan Lu asked Confucius to sell his carriage so that an outer coffin (guo) could be made for Yan Hui’s burial. Confucius replied, “Whether talented or not, when it comes to one’s son, each is speaking of his own child. When my son Li died, he had a coffin but no outer coffin. I did not sell my carriage to provide him with one. Moreover, as someone who once held the rank of da fu (high official), I cannot go on foot – it would violate ritual propriety.”
Note
This passage from the Analects of Confucius reveals his profound sense of fairness, adherence to ritual norms (ritual propriety), and emotional restraint grounded in principle. Though he deeply loved Yan Hui – calling him the only true “eager learner” – he refuses to grant special favor, even in death. By comparing Yan Hui to his own son Li, Confucius emphasizes impartiality: if he did not give his own son an outer coffin due to financial or ritual constraints, he cannot make an exception for another, however beloved. More importantly, his refusal stems not from stinginess but from commitment to social role and ritual decorum. As a former da fu, he is bound by the ceremonial requirement to ride in a carriage; walking barefoot would undermine the dignity of his office and disrupt the symbolic order that ritual propriety sustains. Thus, Confucius prioritizes ethical consistency and ritual integrity over emotional impulse or personal affection. This reflects a core Confucian tenet: genuine compassion must be expressed within the framework of ritual propriety, not outside it. True virtue lies not in grand gestures of grief, but in upholding right conduct even amid sorrow.
Further Reading
When Yan Hui died, the Master cried, “Alas! Heaven has forsaken me! Heaven has forsaken me!” Analects 11.9 (Xian Jin)
Shows Confucius’s deep emotional bond with Yan Hui – making his refusal to sell the carriage not due to lack of love, but adherence to principle.
The Master said, “Govern through ritual and deference.” Analects 13.3 (Zi Lu)
Reinforces that ritual propriety is foundational to personal and social order – Confucius’s refusal to walk is not pride, but preservation of ritual structure.
顏淵死，顏路請子之車以為之椁。子曰：「才不才，亦各言其子也。鯉也死，有棺而無椁。吾不徒行以為之椁。以吾從大夫之後，不可徒行也。」
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