When Gong Xingzi was mourning the death of his son, You Shi (the Right Minister, Wang Huan, styled Zi Ao) came to offer condolences. As soon as he entered, some people stepped forward to speak with him, while others went directly to his seat to talk with him.
But Mencius did not speak to the Right Minister at all.
The Right Minister was displeased and said,
“All the other gentlemen spoke with me, yet Mencius alone refused to speak – surely he is slighting me!”
When Mencius heard this, he replied:
“According to ritual propriety, in formal settings like court or ceremonies, one must not cross beyond one’s assigned position to speak with another, nor step across ranks to bow. I was simply trying to observe proper ritual conduct. Yet Zi Ao takes this as a personal slight – how strange is that!”
公行子有子之喪，右師往弔，入門，有進而與右師言者，有就右師之位而與右師言者。孟子不與右師言，右師不悅曰：「諸君子皆與驩言，孟子獨不與驩言，是簡驩也。」
孟子聞之，曰：「禮，朝廷不歷位而相與言，不踰階而相揖也。我欲行禮，子敖以我為簡，不亦異乎？」
Note
This passage from Mencius: Li Lou II uses a minor incident at a funeral to illuminate core Confucian ideas about ritual as social order, the moral independence of the scholar, and ritual propriety as a tool of political critique.
Observing ritual is not arrogance – it is respect for order. When others mistake adherence to ritual propriety for coldness, it reveals how deeply the spirit of ritual has been forgotten.
Ritual is order, Not flattery
The Right Minister, Wang Huan, was a powerful favorite of King Xuan of Qi. Others rushed to greet him – not out of genuine respect, but to curry favor. Mencius refrained not from personal animosity, but because speaking across assigned positions would violate ritual protocol.
As the Book of Rites states:
“Do not overstep your rank; do not encroach upon another’s place.”
For Confucians, ritual propriety is an objective public framework – not a performance of personal warmth.
The Scholar’s Moral Autonomy
Historical records suggest Wang Huan was a sycophantic minister. Mencius’s distance reflects the Confucian ideal of not flattering the powerful. This embodies Confucius’s teaching:
“The gentleman harmonizes but does not conform” (Analects 13.23).
Zhu Xi later commented:
“Mencius observed ritual propriety – he did not slight Huan. It was Huan who failed to understand ritual propriety.”
A symptom of ritual collapse
Wang Huan equated silence with disrespect – a sign that, in the Warring States era, ritual had degenerated into superficial sociability.
Mencius’s exclamation “How strange!” expresses sorrow: when observing ritual propriety is seen as rudeness, society has lost its moral compass. This echoes Confucius:
“Ritual! Ritual! Is it merely about jade and silk?” (Analects 17.11).
Ritual as quiet resistance
Unable to openly challenge authoritarian power, Confucian scholars used strict adherence to ritual propriety as subtle dissent. By refusing to break rank – even for a powerful minister – Mencius upheld a higher standard of justice. This strategy of “resisting power through ritual” influenced later traditions like Eastern Han “pure criticism” and Ming-dynasty appeals to ancestral statutes.
Historical Context: Mencius in Qi
Mencius once served in Qi but left disillusioned. Wang Huan likely represented the pragmatic, amoral politics Mencius opposed.
At Gong Xingzi’s semi-public funeral, Mencius demonstrated how a scholar navigates complex social hierarchies without compromising principle.
Once Mencius went to the state of Teng to offer condolences on behalf of Qi. The king assigned Wang Huan as his deputy for the mission. Mencius also chose not to speak with Wang Huan about the affairs of the mission.
Rules vs. Personal Favor
Today, many confuse politeness with flattery. Mencius reminds us: true respect lies in honoring shared rules, not catering to individual egos. In workplaces or governments, insisting on procedural fairness – rather than “making exceptions” – is often misread as unfriendliness, yet it is precisely what ensures equality and dignity for all.
In essence:
While all rush toward power, one man holds his place; when the world mistakes warmth for ritual, he alone knows that order is the truest reverence. It is not I who slight you – it is you who have forgotten ritual propriety.
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