In dealing with mean people. the difficulty lies not in being too strict; but in avoiding a fastidious attitude.
In dealing with noble-spirited people, the difficulty lies not in being deferential, but in observing the proprieties.
待小人不难于严，而难于不恶；待君子不难于恭，而难于有礼。
Notes
Treating petty persons: Strictness without resentment
Enforcing firm boundaries against those of low character (e.g., rejecting unreasonable demands, correcting misconduct) is straightforward. The true challenge lies in avoiding inner resentment — contempt, anger, or vengeful impulses stirred by their faults.
Treating noble persons: Reverence without flattery
Showing surface-level deference to virtuous individuals (e.g., humble speech, courteous demeanor) is easy. The difficulty resides in consistently embodying authentic respect — honoring them sincerely as equals without fawning or forfeiting one’s integrity.
Core Insight: Anchoring conduct in inner poise, not external triggers
Both lines share a unifying principle: The essence of interaction lies not in whether others are “petty” or “noble,” but in whether one preserves inner clarity and measure.
- No resentment toward petty persons: Shields the heart from negativity, maintaining peace and discernment.
- Authentic respect toward noble persons: Rejects opportunistic attachment, upholding independence and dignity.
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