4.19
The Master said, “While father and mother are alive, a good son does not wander far afield; or if he does so, goes only where he has said he was going.”
子曰：「父母在，不遠遊。遊必有方。」
Note
This passage from the Analects tell us that while parents are alive, particularly in their elderly years requiring care, children should strive to remain nearby to attend to and accompany them. One should not distance themselves from parents arbitrarily. Even when distant travel is necessary, thoughtful provisions must be made for the parents’ well-being. Let your parents know where you are going and keep regular contact with them.
Confucius also said:
“Let parents only worry about one’s illness.”(The Analects 2.6)
This aligns with the core tenet of “not traveling far while parents are alive; if one must travel, one must have a definite plan”. It emphasizes that children should take “not causing parents anxiety” as the bottom line of their conduct.
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